Having children is one of the most natural and deeply rooted human desires. Yet for many, achieving pregnancy and maintaining it can be a complex and emotionally challenging journey. When the path to parenthood is not straightforward, the emotional impact can range from frustration to grief — and at times, despair.
Modern fertility treatments have advanced significantly, offering hope and possibility to many who face fertility challenges. However, fertility care is often a journey in itself, filled with uncertainty, waiting, and emotional highs and lows. The process can be mentally, emotionally, and spiritually exhausting. For many, learning to manage these emotions becomes just as important as the medical care itself.
In honour of Infertility Awareness Week, here are some key strategies that can help support emotional well-being while navigating the fertility journey.
1. Honour Your Emotions and Connect with Others
When you're facing fertility challenges, it’s completely normal to feel like you're on an emotional rollercoaster. One day you may feel hopeful — perhaps after a promising consultation or a new treatment plan — and the next, discouraged by another negative test or a menstrual cycle beginning again.
If you’ve experienced pregnancy loss, these highs and lows can be even more intense, and the grieving process may linger longer than expected.
It’s important to acknowledge your emotions without judgment. Feeling sadness, anger, jealousy, or even numbness does not make you weak — it makes you human.
Connecting with others who are also navigating fertility issues can be incredibly grounding. Whether through online communities, support groups, or trusted friends, sharing your experience can reduce isolation and offer emotional validation. You may be surprised how many people in your circle — or just beyond it — have similar stories.
2. Fill Your Time with Positive Distraction
Fertility concerns can easily become all-consuming. It’s not uncommon to feel like every aspect of your life revolves around treatment cycles, timing, or tracking symptoms. This can lead to chronic stress, restlessness, difficulty sleeping, and anxiety.
One of the most effective ways to counteract this is through positive distraction — intentionally scheduling time for activities that bring joy, calm, or a sense of normalcy.
This will look different for everyone but might include:
Yoga or light exercise
Nature walks or gardening
Brunch with friends
Watching a favourite movie
Reading, crafting, or journaling
Spending time with pets
Exploring new hobbies
These moments won’t erase the pain — but they can create breathing space and help restore emotional balance.
3. Keep Communicating with Your Partner
Fertility challenges can place significant stress on a relationship. The emotional burden, the repeated disappointments, and the physical demands of treatment can create strain — even in strong partnerships.
Open and honest communication is essential. Make space to talk about your feelings and invite your partner to do the same. This shared vulnerability fosters understanding and connection.
Even if you're coping in different ways, being present and empathetic with one another can strengthen your relationship and deepen your mutual support.
4. Protect Your Heart by Creating Boundaries
Fertility struggles can be triggered by a variety of everyday interactions — pregnancy announcements, baby showers, social media scrolls, or intrusive questions from well-meaning acquaintances.
Learning to create and honour emotional boundaries is an act of self-care. This may mean:
Taking breaks from social media
Skipping certain gatherings or events
Preparing a gentle, rehearsed response to questions like “Do you have kids?”
It’s perfectly acceptable to say, “That’s something we’re working on,” and move on. Remember: you control your story and who you share it with.
In some cases, opening up to trusted friends or family can lead to unexpected support and emotional relief. But that choice is always yours.
5. Build a Supportive Healthcare Team
Empower yourself by creating a team of healthcare providers who can guide and support you throughout your fertility journey. Ask questions, learn about your diagnosis and treatment options, and become an active participant in your care.
An integrative approach often provides the most holistic support. Consider a care team that includes:
A fertility specialist (REI/OBGYN)
A naturopathic doctor
An acupuncturist
A counselor or therapist experienced in fertility support
Each professional brings a unique perspective, and together, they can help address the physical, emotional, and mental aspects of your journey.
Closing Thoughts
Fertility challenges are deeply personal and profoundly emotional. If you’re navigating this path, know that you are not alone — and that support exists in many forms.
While the road may be longer or more complex than expected, your value, identity, and worth are not defined by your fertility. Whether or not you share your story, whether or not treatments are successful the first (or tenth) time, your experience is valid.
Make space for healing, lean into support, and allow yourself joy where you can find it.
BIO
Dr. Meghan van Drimmelen is a naturopathic physician, women's and children's health expert, and co-founder of Juniper Family Health, an integrative clinic located in Victoria BC. She has dedicated her practice to the care of women and their families, and has a passion for supporting women through fertility challenges, pregnancy and postpartum, hormone imbalance, and growing healthy vibrant children.